Do You Trust Him?
By J. Lee
Most of us have wondered at one point or another what the purpose of life is. The answers to this question will vary greatly depending on whom you ask. It’s a query that has puzzled man from the dawn of history. The shortest and most concise explanation I have found is in the book of Amos, which simple states, “Prepare to meet thy God.” (Amos 4:12) Can you imagine how nearly impossible it would be to finish a race or any other endeavor without a map, let alone instructions? It is for this reason why I will shift my attention to, in hopes to give people a perspective of hope, that independent of the affairs in the world, that assurance and hope can be achievable by anyone who seek it. It is this knowledge that strengthens me to carry on forward toward the goal, to meet my God.
“I’ve never seen someone die before, not until now.” Those were the words I inscribed in my journal that fateful day. Little did I know how much that day would change my life. Just several weeks prior, my companion and I received a request to administer a blessing to a cardiac patient in the ICU at Queen’s Hospital in Honolulu. Given the numbers of blessings I have participated in before, I assumed that this would be a simple blessing for someone who had a health challenge, but I was mistaken. My faith would be, unexpectedly and suddenly, put to the test.
A young man who was on his way to pick up his friends from the airport had a sudden cardiac arrest on the freeway. Due to the lack of medical attention for several critical minutes, his brain was deprived of oxygen. He was found by an alert driver who called 911. The paramedics stabilized him at the scene but by the time they arrived at the hospital he was comatose. His parents immediately flew to Hawaii and called us to request a blessing for their precious 21-year old son.
Day after day my companion and I, aware that they didn’t have any family nearby, visited them to keep them company and help in any way we could. I was inspired by the faith and hope this family exhibited, dealing with an adoring son who lay in a hospital far from home in a coma. Surely, I thought, the Lord will give this family a miracle! I had faith that God worked miracles on this earth, that this righteous family deserved one.
We visited this faithful many times during their stay in Honolulu, offering our support and prayers. It was in this hospital room that I experienced one of the most sacred experiences of my life.
While having dinner one night with a family we were visiting, I had an impression that we needed to go to the hospital at once. I considered it a little rude to leave in the middle of dinner so I thought we could wait and go by the hospital afterward. The feeling returned, this time stronger and with increased urgency. I realized that I couldn’t ignore this strong prompting any longer. After consulting with my companion of this feeling, he straightaway agreed. We hurriedly explained our need to return to the hospital and excused ourselves from our dinner.
“I felt it too, Elder” he muttered to me as we left. “I just didn’t know if this was a feeling of mine. Now I realize it wasn’t.”
Looking at the time, I worried that we would be getting back late, but the feeling intensified even stronger, telling me to hurry. We rushed to the hospital and almost ran to the ICU where the young man was staying. There, we saw his parents, his sister, and her husband around the bedside. We waited outside. We wanted to give the family time alone with their loving son. It came as a surprise when the father noticed us and invited us to come in. The family stood quietly and reverently around the bed, in the attitude of waiting. Unsure of what to do, I stood still, respectful of the family’s feelings. I was confused. Why had the Spirit drawn us to this young man and his family this night? Without a word, the father signaled the nurse present to disconnect their son from the ventilator that was keeping his body alive.
As we watched the electrocardiogram, the heartbeat slowed, the intervals between beats grew longer and slowly the line went flat. I knew what that meant and could no longer hold back my tears. It was painfully emotional to fathom what I had just experienced, and I could only imagine what his family, particularly his parents might be feeling at that moment. This was my first experience of personally facing death. What happened to the miracle I was expecting? I questioned everything I knew and taught as a missionary, thinking, that I just saw someone pass away! After all the prayers we had given over the last couple of weeks! I asked myself, where was God? How could God let this young man die with so much promise before him and this wonderful family suffer his lose? Is there really a life after this? Where is he now? There I was, a missionary of Jesus Christ, in search of answers to the questions I have helped others understand so many times in the past.
Death is an inescapable aspect of our existence. All will pass through its hands. Whoever we become in this short mortal life; we are all susceptible to it, no matter how low or how high our station in life. What happens next changed my whole perspective.
Tears flowed from my eyes, seeing the end of such a promising life. I turned to my companion to see that he too, was crying. It hurt to see someone go, especially after we had become so close to this family in their time of anguish. After a few minutes of reflecting what just happened, I regained my composure and slowly began to approach his parents to comfort them. I thought, if this is how I feel, I could only imagine what his family must feel right now, how numbing the pain must be to see your son go. In my honest attempt to comfort his parents, I discovered what true faith in God truly was. I noticed no tears flowing down their cheeks, but rather a gentle, sincere smile gazing at me with compassion. This extraordinary family were the ones who asked me how I was doing! I was beyond puzzled to think how I, the stranger, seemed to be more grief-stricken than they! So, I boldly, but sincerely, asked how they could be so brave at a time like this. What they said to me pierced my heart.
“Elder,” the mother said softly, with the father standing nearby, giving comfort, his hand on my shoulder. “The Lord knows each one of us. We are His loving children. I know Him enough to trust in Him and His plan for each of us. We know our son has left his earthly body behind and has gone on to join his loved ones who have passed beyond the veil before him. We just have to put our trust in Him.” I was astonished beyond words by her response. In that lonely intensive care unit, I heard the sincere and powerful faith of two loving parents. They knew, depended on, and trusted the Savior and His Atonement, literally and genuinely “trusting the Lord with all [their hearts] and leaned not unto [their] own understanding” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
As I tried to make sense of my mixed feeling of love, lose and the prompting of the Holy Ghost, I was enveloped by peace, so much so that it was tangible to all those present! At that moment, standing in that ICU room, I felt like I was standing on holy ground where earth and heaven met. Sanctified by the presence of angels, knowing that God has not left his children alone. I knew then, as strong as I know now, that there is life after this mortal existence, evident and achievable, because of Christ’s sacred Atonement. Death need not be permanent, and tribulations need not be final, for the Savior triumphed over them all! Through this experience I learned to trust God more fully and sincerely despite all of life’s turmoil. Peace and hope are possible even in the times of desperation and despair. We just need to hold on to what we already know and be steadfast and unmovable in our faith in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.
O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?... thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labor is not in vain in the Lord. (1 Corinthians 15:55-58)
As I reflect upon this event, I have renewed hope and gratitude for the simplicities of life and a renewed understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I’m assured that our Heavenly Father has a hand in directing our lives, if we only let Him. We all have a purpose to fulfill here on earth and it behooves all of us to find that purpose and then to simple live it.
This special experience has brought additional light to open my understanding of God’s plan for me and my family. In an unforeseen instant, what most thought mattered was no more, greets us with the surprise of the unknown. I have come to realize that what I thought was important, that took up so much of my time on this earth, has little meaning in the eternities. I was wasting precious time I could be using to serve God. I am more cognizant of my purpose God sent me here to do and avoid wasting my priceless, limited time on frivolous and insignificant activities. I have come to value those pursuits that will carry on into the eternities; love, family and friends, and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
Jesus truly is the Christ. The Lord triumphed over every foe of humanity, sin and death. He broke the chains of sin that bind the lives of men. His conquest over the power of death and the grave brings unmeasured gratitude and rejoicing in my heart. Jesus is more than our, friend, redeemer, and Lord––He is the Christ, the only being that could and would save you and me, a true Savior. I love Him with all that I am and all that I have. My faith fills my life with radiant light and beaming hope to know that He lives! His reality and existence, knowing that He now stands with the Father in all honor and glory, is the only knowledge I need to carry on forward with the bright hope of a disciple of Jesus Christ. For me, this is the true meaning of being His disciple, a sure and unchangeable assurance through and because of Jesus Christ!
J. Lee
J. Lee is a student of Brigham Young University- Idaho. He currently majors in Political Science and Economics with an aspiration of being an International Lawyer someday. He served as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in Hawaii and owes much of his understanding and growth of the gospel from his experiences there. This has inspired him to continually reflect on the daily miracles that go unnoticed in life. His hobbies include learning languages, traveling, writing, playing the piano, and the outdoors. He currently writes about his inspirational experiences and tethers them to the gospel truths he gleaned from them. He hopes that these stories of faith will fortify your trust in God and magnify your desire to press forward continually as a disciple of Christ.